**WARNING VENTING AHEAD**

My emotions are all over the board lately. How is it we can be happy and sad at the same time?

So happy about being a Grandma

Sad they are so far away

Happy for RW"s job

Sad that it's in Alabama

Happy to hear David say, "Gram maw I love you"

Sad I can't hold him

Happy for the year I had with him

Sad for the time I will not have with Caleb or any other baby that comes along.

Sad that I will never have a relationship with them. No birthday's, no first day of school, no school plays, no sports, no cuddle time.

Missing my Cassie..oh my heart hurts. 

I can honestly say that not having Jeff here I am sure intensifies these feelings. I am hurting, angry, sad, mad, lonely and feel so bad for Grace and Jeffrey. So yes I am venting, whining, complaining whatever you want to call it and I am posting this.

I often struggle with how "real" to be on my blog. Oh the posts I have written and not published.While I know the Lord as my Savior I am still human. So while I know that God has walked ahead of me I do have feelings of frustration. The difference is that with my hurt I can call on my Father to help me through. 

In my distress I called to the LORD;
   I cried to my God for help.
From his temple he heard my voice;
   my cry came before him, into his ears.
Psalm 18:6

One of my favorite verses

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰ For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30

Thankful to have a Lord to come before me. 

2010 in Subway Art form

He's here!

RW arrived safe and sound and has spent the morning getting to know David. Monkey as we call him has taken to his Daddy very well. Praying they have a great time together while he is home on R&R. God Bless our troops!

Cassie Update

Just wanted to give everyone an update on Cassie. She is still contracting nothing new to report other than that. Just early labor that she hopes will either stop or actually turn into something. We would appreciate any and all prayers. She and RW talk everyday and so he is up to date on the situation.

Baby update

As some may know Cassie has been having contractions since early Sunday morning. They continue to come and it looks like this will be the case until her body says it's time for the baby. There is no need to stop the labor because she is at full term however she is very tired having done this for so many hours already. This could go for a few days or weeks like this. We would appreciate prayers for Cassie and the baby but also for RW who is so far away and can't do a thing. She is not answering her phone except to RW at this point. She just is not in the mood to talk and anybody that knows Cassie doesn't want to talk to her then anyway! We will let you all know when there is news.

Sigh of relief..for the moment

Cassie received a call this morning from her love and he is back on the base safe. I cannot stress enough how much these troops are in need of prayer. I can say this much..it is going to be a long and rough year for these men and women if it continues as it has in the past several weeks.

Here is a prayer someone sent me..every so perfect!

Lord, hold our troops in your loving hands. Protect them as they protect us. Bless them and their families for the selfless acts they perform for us in our time of need. I ask this in the name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior.
Amen.

Plane, Train and Automobile

Well, we are finally back in Siskiyou County after flying out just last week to Colorado. The kids loved their first airplane ride and once we got to the airport in Colorado and had to take a train to the baggage claim...(big hit with Bub).. we were met with Cassie and RW the kids were elated!
We were able to spend a couple days with RW before we had to say our goodbyes on Friday. Most favorite memory for the kids was going bowling...they love bowling with their brother! Our last night he took us to a German restaurant name Edelweiss of all things..for those who don't know Jeff and I were married in a chapel with the same name.

RW is off on another tour overseas. It really took me back being on Post and talking to the soldiers. Cassie and I were talking about how there is just no irony with the Lord. His plans are perfect.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Now after having been the "Army Wife" for seventeen years I am now here to help my daughter through this time in her life. When RW wasn't around she cried but in front of him no tears. None of us shed any. That is a must being a military wife or family. It is just too hard for the soldiers to bare. I am so proud of my girl and that is another reason RW loves her so much. She understands the life and the part she needs to play.

Our mission now is to take care of Cassie and soon to be Lil' David. We also will continue to pray for our troops all over the world.

Faces of Deployment

Saying goodbye is never easy.

Please continue to pray for the Cassie and RW.

More on our trip later.

Army Life

Life is ever changing for Cassie and RW. Now ...as of this morning anyway, RW won't be deploying until May. For my friends we former Army wives know all too well how things change by the moment and how very frustrating it can be. Please pray for the kids as they are preparing for this deployment. I am going to go out and pick Cassie up and bring her home when RW does deploy. Just want to be in the background at that time as I know how important that it is for them as a couple to do this alone. I plan on keeping busy with the kids and being there to help Cassie through it after the fact. I will say this much I don't miss that part and I know I will cry!

Smile!

Cassie and RW went to the Down Under Aquarium in Denver today with some friends. Here is a picture of the two of them. So cute!