When Jeff was sick we both felt like everyones lives were moving forward all the while we were in our globe and/or bubble. Which I guess was somewhat true. We were in a fight mode and our life revolved around that slow awful process.
Well, I am there again. Honestly It's been like this for a few months now. I feel like I'm just going through the motions wondering when and if a change is coming. I just don't believe this is all God has planned for me. I want so much more out of this life. Daily reminding myself to be faithful. That God has this life of ours under control. For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future Jeremiah 29:11. Which is so hard for the planner in me. I am sure part of this is in response to where I am at right now.
Single parenting is not easy at all whatsoever!
Parents getting older~health issues arising
Grandchildren living too far away
And being single...STINKS!
I was just sharing ( very hard for me to do )with someone that where I am at right now now is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. It is not easy being single trying to manage a household, home school, work in ministry, deal with aging parents, Cassie and Grand babies living so far away and raise followers of Christ. And I know life was not meant to be easy. But having raised one child with Jeff and having been married 19 years I can most certainly tell you it is easier with a spouse. Trying desperately to rest in scripture.
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronmony31:6
So for now I will try ( Oh Lord help me ) to be content with where I am at. I shall sit in my globe and feast on scripture to hold me through this valley. I will continue to pray for my children grow in their relationship with Christ. And I will eagerly await to see what the Lord as in store for us.
