26 years

Twenty-six  years ago today I married my best friend. I feel so blessed to have spent nineteen of those married. But, I also mourn the loss of what could have been. On our 18th anniversary Jeff wanted new wedding bands. He chose two beautiful silver bands. I remember just weeks before he went home he handed his ring to me because it no longer fit. But told me he always loved me and he always would. I miss you babe so very much.

I can say this. while the days flow into weeks and weeks in to months..months into years. One thing remains I still have an empty place in my heart. I was chatting with a friend the other day about how not having a spouse enables me to be there for others that I would not normally be able to do. I am thankful for that. My prayer everyday is to live and do for the Lord. But most of the time this ol' heart of mine is hanging by a thread. Loneliness can be crippling. It is by the grace of God that I get up and face each day. I miss the days of knowing just by having Jeff at my side everything would be okay. I miss that.

Missing my man + a need to create =